Needing prayers....

Made it through my first 8 weeks with B's....I have to thank my husband, Alex Rocky Wilemon for his encouragement, and support. He made me believe in myself and helped me get enrolled at AMU to begin the journey to gain my AS. I cannot thank him enough. He has done more for me than most have or ever would. I haven't been the best wife in the past 2 years, and I cannot make up for it. I am doing everything imaginable to be a better person than who I have been in those times. Gaining my education is just the start, I have so much more to do and prove. I may never be able to redeem myself, but I am doing all I can to be a better person and wife than I was. I love him with all my heart and soul, and if I were to ever lose him, I would lose a huge part of myself. It's truly not something I like to think about.

Prayers please...

I have been blessed with an amazing Father-In-Law and Mother-In-Law. Right now my mother in law is not doing well at all. This is very painful for my husband because he cannot be with her at this time. I am praying he is able to get home to see her before she passes. She is such a strong woman in the 5 five years that I have been blessed to meet, know, and love. Every time I have gone to visit her, I have always shown her a picture of Rocky and talked to her about him the majority of the time. I have watched her eyes light up, kick, and make sweet sounds of recognition of her baby boy. Just because she may not have a voice does not mean that she does not know who her son is. She knows him and she loves him. Her disease is so unknown, that for the past five years that I have known her, I have done everything and read everything I could to learn more and to understand. I pray everyday that she is not in pain, how do you know if she is in pain when she does not have a voice? It makes me sad, I cry, and after finding out the condition she was in today while I was at work, I had to excuse myself to go and take a moment to stop crying and stay strong. My husband needs me, he needs my strength. I don't like to see him hurting and all I can do is be here for him in this time of need.

IF you are a follower and reading my blog, I pray that you will keep my husband, and his mother in your prayers. I pray that if this truly is her time, that it be painless and swift. I wish we could hear her voice just once before she passes, but in the past five years, I never heard a distinct word, but I have enjoyed her babbling. I miss hearing that now. Please pray and I thank you now for your prayers.

Carie Wilemon
Wife to SSG Alex Rocky Wilemon Sr

CONGRATS & HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Congrats to Delta Company, 2-58, Infantry!!! Today as I watched my youngest son graduate and complete his Basic Training at Fort Benning, Georgia I was overwhelmed with emotion. Not only is my husband currently deployed, but now my son has joined the Army and is now an Infantryman. I am so proud of both of my Soldiers and the careers they have chosen. I am also very proud of my son Chazman who is in Culinary Arts, and will move on next to Pharmacy Tech training. He is so darn smart, and I know that with both certifications it will help him move forward with his social skills issues, and help build his self estyeem. Having a child/young adult with Autism is very challenging. He strives so hard to not be "Autistic" and I know it must be emotionally hard. I do not want him to go through life continually being labled. It's not fair. I love having my son with me. I miss them being within the same household, but I know that my boys are now young men/adults. I don't know how my parents did it. No matter what, I know Chaz will always improve every day and always works hard to not be "different".  Colton will now be embarking on his career, away from home, and me, his mom. It's so hard to see your child start their life as an adult without you holding their hand any longer. I am so happy that Colton is sharing not only his graduation day with us, but also Thanksgiving, and hopefully many more holidays in the future if his job allows.

Happy Thanksgiving!!! I have decided this year NOT to premake everything as I would normally do, not because I am lazy, BUT because I am spending this time with my two boys together as a family. It's very hard being away from my husband during the holidays, BUT I know this is how it works when you are married to a Soldier. I respect him and his job so very much. I think with every day and every year, I grow to respect him and his career more and more. I know a lot of spouses that resent the separations but it has made me appreciate my time with my husband more and more, day by day. In this past year we have had many downs over ups, but I am taking strides to improve myself to be the better wife at all costs. While he is away, I want him to see and know that I am fully well, and capable of "slaying every dragon which comes my way". I am that woman, and I am the woman he fell in love with so many years ago. I intend to remain that person, and grow old with him until we get old, rickety, and blind.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO EVERYONE!!!!! I hope everyone has a blessed day with family and friends!!! My prayers go out to all who cannot be with their families for this holiday.

So PROUD of our sons



HOLY COW!

I cannot believe it's been over a year since I last blogged. So much has happened in the last year! My amazing SSG returned from the two year PCS in ching chong land, then after being home 7 months, it's DEPLOYMENT. Yes it totally sucks, BUT he's getting it out of the way so that it's done and it won't be a surprise. My youngest is also now in the Army, and he chose Infantry...mom is not thrilled, BUT Colt seems to love it, and that's all that matters to me. I cannot believe he just graduated high school in May and here he's graduating from Basic Training & AIT very soon. Chaz is still in school for the Culinary Arts program, and will start the Pharmacy Tech program next fall. I am finishing my college classes online for now, and also working part time. My SSG is VERY supportive of me finishing my schooling, and I am so very blessed for that. I love my life as an Army Wife and Mom. No one said it would be easy, and it hasn't but I am handling things much better than I ever have...thank goodness for therapists and good friends!!!!!!  I only wish my ex-husband, the boy's father, would quit being such a denial downer. Seriously, YOU think our 20 year old son is a 20 year old MAN??!!! Well Kiss My Grits! He may be in the body of a 20 year old man, BUT considering I have been the one raising him for over 18 years, I PROMISE you that his Psychiatrist is CORRECT....he is NOT mentally nor emotionally 20 years old. Try 12-13...HE IS AUTISTIC! YES, highly FUNCTIONAL, BUT NO he CANNOT drive, he CANNOT keep a job because of MELT DOWNS, he CANNOT live ALONE. MAYBE one day it may happen, BUT until then...per his doctors which you think I paid off, I am to be named his GUARDIAN, as will his brother, should ANYTHING happen to me or my husband. My husband has been a Dad to our sons, not the actual biological father. I get so upset and wound up over the FALSE accusations, disbelief, and complete ignorance of people that have NO CLUE because they have not been in the picture, BY THEIR CHOICE, and THINK they know these young men...OH and stalking your son's Facebook page to make contact with his no longer girl friend, TOTALLY WRONG!!! Your son doesn't want to talk to you, and he is even more upset that his page was stalked, and his then girlfriend messaged/spoke with you. TOTAL BETRAYAL in his eyes. My sons and I are VERY close. I grew up raising them, and I know I made some mistakes, BUT no matter what, I am their mom, and they love and respect me as I do them. Colt was on his 48 hour pass, sadly Chaz could not be with us because of prior commitments with school....Colt has grown so much! He paid for groceries, dinner, and took us to a hockey game!!!! It was soooooo much fun, and so amazing to see that my baby boy is maturing and becoming a man! I was so happy that my husband was able to see him as well before he deployed. I love my boys and my husband so much. I cannot say it enough of how blessed I am.Next...going to court against the ex, as I said AGAIN! You know you signed that divorce decree that stated you would provide support for your Autistic son that you are now trying to get of...CONTEMPT of COURT...oh and not paying your half of the braces...YES you got letters and amounts sent to you not only by the ORTHODONTIST THAT YOU CALLED STATING YOU WOULD MAKE PAYMENTS TOO, BUT I SENT you the documents as well then you try to say you never knew, never received documents, LIAR-LIAR! I also mailed you everything per the request of DHR who was having you charged with CONTEMPT of court!!!!!

OKAY, I am done venting over this mute point because he will always believe he is innocent and did nothing wrong and never does anything wrong....

I AM READY for this DEPLOYMENT to be OVER!!!!!!! Counting it down!!!

To think....

To think that this time a year ago my husband was home for his first R&R absolutely blows my mind.  We have virtually survived what most would call pure "hell". Has it been easy? Well, in the kindest words with an answer, let me say...HELL NO.  I am human, I cry just as much if not more than most spouses whose husband's are gone or deployed. I am FAITHFUL to my husband and to our vows we took on December 20, 2010, and I have no regrets, and I am thankful that he is as faithful and strong as I am. But do not get me wrong, we both have our days of depression, who wouldn't? Here I am trying to be the wife, the mom, the best friend, the rock, and the Realtor...you think it's easy??? REALLY??!!!  I was living off a dual income which allowed a little bit of allowances, now I am back to one job, and full time school for the next year. I have had to completely re-budget my entire life, and it came at a really crapped up time within a week after I returned to work, post surgery. Yes, I am not happy about it. I had two jobs not only to be able to give all of us nice things, but to keep me from missing my husband. School helps, but it doesn't help pay for things, at least not at this moment.  WE have weathered the crazy exes, who only the Lord knows why they enjoy badgering us, thank goodness for the ugly memories at times to keep us focused and remember WHY it never worked out, and how THANKFUL we are to have found each other. 

Today, well this week has been one of those weeks where all I can do is get up, go to school, eat, go to work, come home, and try not to be depressed. I am not one to be depressed, so for this to be happening is really bothering me. I can only pray that this will stop, that I can lock us into our second home for our next adventure, and make everyone happy, to include myself....wish me luck, because I truly need it...